Mes observations des personnes françaises (et de la France)

After posting my last update, I (not surprisingly) fell into a funk. All I wanted to do was read trashy fiction (Patricia Cornwell, I’m talking about you) and watch “Modern Family.” Now I’m back. Here are my top 10 observations about France: 1. French folks haven’t gotten the memo about cigarettes and cancer. Or, if [...]

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That’s what friends are for

Facebook is a fascinating petri dish. Where else can you find people from all aspects of your life hanging out, sharing information and ribbing each other? Facebook makes it possible for people to have exchanges like this: Granted, as evidenced above, typed words and computer protection can make people say things they might not say [...]

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Résumé of real life

I love this résumé on Craig’s List and I don’t care if it is real or not, or how old it is (2008). Warning: It is quite profane. Here’s my less profane (and therefore less funny) non-work version of my résumé: Résumé of Dubious Achievements OBJECTIVE: Finish my freakin’ dissertation already and get my life [...]

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Behind the smiles

We all look so happy in the Halloween photos, but we were hiding some supreme sadness. I felt like Mr. Roarke from “Fantasy Island,” who used to command, “Smiles, Everyone. Smiles!” Maggie the Dog, Beloved Boxer and Killer of Chickens, died peacefully on the operating table at the vet’s office Saturday afternoon. It was very [...]

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Murder, she wrote

Convicted serial killer accused of fifth slaying From Staff Reports BLOOMINGDALE, Ga. — Convicted serial killer Maggie The Dog is the only suspect in the murder of Shelly The Chicken. Shelly’s father, Eddie Concepción, found the bird’s body Sunday night in the back yard of the family home. Maggie’s younger sister, Mona The Dog is [...]

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Avatar: The Last Sharpie

Dominic and Gideon wake up before Eddie and I do. We’ve been strongly encouraging them to stay in their rooms and play quietly. This morning, Eddie left very early to open the gym. Usually, the kids are up when he leaves at 6:30. Not this morning. I was pleased, thinking they were playing quietly or [...]

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Somebody’s watching me

I haven’t posted about the chickens, Shelly and Jeanne, for a while. It’s because I hate them. They started it. They hated me first. It doesn’t help that they are so much stinkier and messier than Trish was. But they do seem more interested in me lately. They haven’t run quite as fast when I [...]

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Loathing, unadulterated loathing

The chickens hate me. Or they are completely terrified of me. Or both. It makes me sad, because Trish loved me. And I’ve done all the same things with them that I did with her, like talking and petting. There’s nothing worse than ungrateful poultry. It’s foul fowl behavior. But I guess I should expect [...]

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Mona: Lease up

We didn’t need another dog. But it looks like we have one. I think Eddie and I both knew when we took in Mona that she would end up staying. We made (half-hearted) attempts to find another home for her. We thought our friend Sarah’s mom might take her. But I’ll admit we didn’t push [...]

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Coop to fill

Though it pained me to do it, I cleaned out Trish’s coop last weekend. (Sad.) Shelly and Jeanne had grown fast, and it was almost time for them to take over the coop. I knew the time had come last night when I heard a commotion. My feathered friends had found their wings and were [...]

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